Thanksgiving Edition

The Word Of The Day is Turkeys.

Well, it's Thanksgiving tomorrow.  While all of you are chomping on your turkeys and eating your pies and potatoes, watching the three putrid NFL games that you're being force fed because of these so-called traditions, I will be at work, watching people walking down the hallway to the restaurant here in the hotel to go eat and gorge on their Thanksgiving dinners.  Now that I am single and have no one to share this holiday with, I'm not celebrating it.  What's the point?

Anyhow, since it is Thanksgiving, and, well, we are On The Farm, I think it's appropriate that we present the first annual Word On The Farm Turkeys for 2009.  So without further ado,

Keizo Konishi - How do you justify voting Miguel Cabrera as the American League Most Valuable Player?  As you avid readers saw on my blog yesterday, Cabrera was at best the ninth most valuable player in the league last year.  Inexcusable.

Manny Ramirez - The biggest clown in Major League Baseball got himself a 50 game suspension for taking a banned substance, allegedly for "erectile dysfunction".  It's bad enough to get caught taking a banned substance.  It's MUCH worse to admit you have ED.  That's what Cialis and Viagra are for.

J.P. Ricciardi - Deservedly fired at the end of the baseball season, Ricciardi failed to make the trade to deal Roy Halladay during the season with either Philadelphia or Boston at the trade deadline, thus lowering the price that they can get during this offseason.  Halladay has since come out and said he will not re-sign with the Jays.  Dumb move, J.P.

Lane Kiffin - Rule one of becoming a coach of a major college football program: Don't rile up the opposing coaches.  He alienated Urban Meyer (he being the coach of the National Champion Florida Gators) by saying he would take the Volunteers and run all over the Gators.  How'd that work out?  At least you kept it close, Coach.

Bill Belichick - I love The Hoodie as much as anyone, but you have to be an absolute turkey to go for it on fourth and two from your own 28 yard line against Peyton Manning and the Colts.  Dumb, dumb, dumb.

Maurice Jones-Drew - This wasn't a turkey move as far as NFL plays goes, but it was a turkey move as far as Fantasy Football goes.  Mau-Jo cost approximately 10,000 players wins a couple of weeks ago by taking a knee at the 1 yard line instead of scoring the open touchdown, including himself.  Fortunately, I had already built a 50 point lead so those six points didn't matter to me.  Otherwise he'd be higher on the list.

Donnie Walsh - You passed on Brandon Jennings and Ty Lawson for who???  Someone who doesn't fit the Mike D'Antoni offense?  It's no wonder the Knicks have sucked this entire decade.  But at least they aren't the 0-14 New Jersey Nets.

Larry Johnson - "I'm not Grand-mama" Johnson made the cardinal mistake of using Twitter to spew out a gay slur against head coach Todd Haley.  If Johnson had been rushing for at least four yards a carry, maybe he's still in Kansas City.  Rushing for less than three yards a carry and doing this means you lose your paycheck.

Major League Umpires - Showed how blind they really are, letting a Joe Mauer sure double be called a foul ball even though it was clearly fair.  Then, in what should have been a double play, Ed Brinkman called only one of two players out at third base that were both off the third base bag.  Those were the most egregious calls, but they weren't the only ones.  More on officiating later.

Dante Wesley - You'll remember Wesley as the clown who launched himself into kick returner Clifton Smith, knocking Smith out of the game and out for a couple of weeks.  The NFL only gave him a one game suspension, although I think he should have been gone for the year.  I still think that way.

LaGarrett Blount - The senior Oregon running back sucker punched a Boise State player after their loss in the season opener, then went after the fans of Boise State after the game.  Suspended for the season by Oregon officials after the game, he was re-instated earlier this month after showing contrition.  I praise Oregon for giving this kid another chance to get his life in order and give him a chance at the NFL.

Brandon Spikes/Urban Meyer - The Florida All-American linebacker attempted to eye gouge Georgia running back Washaun Ealey in the middle of a pile a few weeks ago.  Urban Meyer suspended him for the first half against Vanderbilt, and it took a media circus to force Spikes to suspend himself for the entire game. This should have been the decision from the beginning, no matter what Ealey thought.

Bud Adams - His display of bird flipping during the Titans win over the Bills a few weeks ago was utterly embarrassing.  His full page ad in the Buffalo paper was worse, because nowhere in the advertisement was there an apology for his actions.

The Female Turkey of the Year goes to:
Elizabeth Lambert, New Mexico women's soccer - How do I explain how big of a turkey she was?  I can't.  I will let her actions speak for themselves.  Lambert's Actions against BYU

And finally, The Turkey of the Year goes to:
Southeastern Conference officials - How bad do you have to be to be suspended by your conference?  One crew was suspended because of egregious calls made in consecutive weeks.  The first was a reckless personal foul called for a touchdown celebration that wasn't much of a celebration.  The next week, they screwed up again, calling a penalty on LSU that cost them a win against Florida.  I wonder how much the Gators administration is paying the officials to give them wins.